Top 10 Assets A Friend Shouldn't Have

1. Assumption (for all the wrong reasons, of course).

It's okay to assume when buying a present or a gift for someone (cuz hey, you're taking a stab at what the person would like), but not when it comes to actions or assuming why a person is a certain way. Don't start assuming something lest you bite your tongue in the end and look like a total dumbass.

2. People who don't practice what they preach.

You don't take your own advice, people start to question your integrity. Which, at the end of the day, is the only thing you have.

3. People who complain if you don't go out with them, but often times they either do the same exact thing to you anyway or are inconsiderate of the fact that you have a life and must prioritize and get your shit together before you can do anything else.

In other words, don't make someone feel bad for not being able to go out with you if you know what kind of a situation they're in. Be considerate of what other people need to do and what they need to get done, because in the end they'll appreciate you more for sticking around and not getting on their ass for it.

4. Jealousy

5. Deception and lies

6. People who have absolutely nothing else to talk about except for the lives of others.

It shows something about yourself... you're small-minded and you don't even have the ability to focus on your own life and how you can better it instead of talking about other peoples' problems.

7. People who flaunt MATERIAL POSSESSIONS.

Be proud of what you got, but also remember to be HUMBLE. It's all that's gonna matter in the end, anyway.

8. People who tell elaborate stories about their life to make themselves feel better.

BORING... and people can see right through you when you do that.

9. People who do terrible things thinking it's all good, then wonder why they're suffering later on.

There's one explanation and one explanation only: karma

10. Screaming not because I'm having fun, but because I'm angry and hurt.

~Courtesy of my friend Monica Morales. I made some changes. I hope you don't mind.

I'm a big girl (literally ) and I can handle my own shit. I'm not gonna whine about things if no one gives a shit. I am my own happiness and I don't need anyone to bring me down. At least I know no one would leave me behind. There are no excuses.

Word to your mother.

so I'm broke now. I've got no income and no money saved up. Does anyone know of any sugardaddys? Hook a sista up! Not being asked to go to an event, dinner, get-together, whatever, doesn't bother me at all. I just shrug it off. It's not like I can afford anything anyways. And plus I'm too embarrassed to tag-a-long and have my friends pay my way around. So I'll just be a hermit for now. School doesn't allow me to have extra time to hang out anyways. Man! I have to give up all the good stuff! But priority first: school.

Does anyone know how to get fish bone out of the throat? I've got one stuck and it's bothering the hell out of me. Damn it.

The Russian wrestling team and American wrestling team are having a 5-on-5 exhibition match. Both teams are down to their final wrestlers, tied at two wins a piece. The remaining American wrestler is 5'10", 175 lbs., and his Russian counterpart is 6'7", 300 lbs and all muscle. The American coach sends his wrestler into the match with little hope of winning. As expected, the Russian has his way with the American. Suddenly, the American explosively turns the match around, pins the Russian, and gains victory for the American team.

The American wrestler returns to the sidelines where the coach asks him, "Son, how were you able to defeat that big Russian? Honestly, I didn't give you much of a chance."

The wrestler says, "Well coach, when he had me down on the ground all rolled up, I saw a pair of nuts dangling in front of my face, and I just bit them as hard as I could."

The coach is shocked. "That's how you beat him?!"

"Hell yeah!" the wrestler says. "You'd be surprised what you can do when you bite your own nuts!"

-Courtesy of Ebaumsworld.com